Issue #4 .... Not Burned Out, Just Lightly Toasted

​The Work in Progmess Team​ April 15, 2025

💌 From the Editor’s Desk

Welcome to Work In Progmess Issue #4—where we don't chase dreams, we schedule them in five-minute increments and still show up two minutes late.

This week’s issue covers:

💵 emotional salaries (spoiler: yours bounced)

💻 unhinged AI prompts from the résumé trenches

🥒 shocking career pivot powered entirely by...pickleball.

Because if we're all going to build the business of ourselves, we might as well expense the tennis elbow.
— The Mess

📊Messy Metric of the Week

88% of hiring managers say they absolutely support salary negotiations—right up until the candidate actually does it. Then it’s “not a cultural fit.” (Source: Word on the Street)

Nope, not even on Sesame Street. But for real…

Job seekers who ask for more money get it 70% of the time. (Source: PayScale)

Turns out, most employers are totally open to paying you more—but only if you’re bold enough to ask first. Because nothing says “great workplace culture” like a secret menu of salaries available only to those who know the magic words.

📰Headline Shocker

📣Rising Star at Work Quietly Wonders If She’s the Problem, Because She’s Not Excited Anymore

"They said I was a rockstar. I haven’t felt like one in months."

By The Progmess Newsroom

ATLANTA, GA — After four years of steady promotions, early logins, and above-average PowerPoint formatting, Sierra Nguyen, 28, sat at her desk on a Tuesday afternoon and realized she hadn’t felt proud of her work in months.

“I didn’t miss a deadline. I’m not burned out. I’m just… completely detached,” she said, while staring blankly at a color-coded to-do list titled “High Impact.”

📊 THE WORKLOAD THAT’S “NOT A BIG DEAL”

Over the past 18 months, Sierra has:

• Revamped the vendor onboarding system
• Trained two new hires
• Covered for a departing manager for five weeks
• Built a Notion dashboard that leadership now uses to track quarterly KPIs
• And received a $25 Amazon gift card labeled “Q1 Gratitude”

Her performance review described her as “solid, dependable, and a team player.”

“I think they meant it as a compliment,” Sierra said. “I just keep wondering if anyone would notice if I stopped doing 30% of what I do.”

📈 THE GRIND IS FINE

According to colleagues, Sierra is known for her reliability, her spotless project timelines, and her eerily perfect Slack tone.

“She’s the kind of person who always says, ‘Got it, looping in now,’ even when no one else does,” said one coworker. “If there’s a fire drill, she’s the one who brings snacks.”

Sierra’s manager calls her “solid,” her quarterly reviews are positive, and she still volunteers to mentor the new hires.

But lately, she says, the wins feel hollow.

“I’m not failing,” she said. “I’m just fading.”

📦 THE BIGGER QUESTION

She’s not looking to quit. She’s not seeking a big leap. She’s just wondering when—or if—the effort will start to feel meaningful again.

“I keep thinking: maybe if I just do more. Maybe if I take on that one new project. Maybe if I speak up a little louder. But it’s like… the goalpost keeps moving. And I’m getting really good at chasing things I don’t even want.”

She recently described her job as “fine” seven times in one meeting.

🤝 Unhinged Lists

This week, Work In Progmess obtained a leaked list of actual prompts sent to ChatGPT by job seekers.

We’re not here to judge. Just to document the chaos. And maybe prevent one more person from submitting a thank-you email that ends with a quote from The Notebook.

🧠 The Prompt Checklist (That’s Alarmingly Relatable):

☑ “Write a cover letter that makes me sound excited, even though I’m not.”

📉 Warning: They can smell the emotional detachment through your serif font.

☑ “Make my résumé sound impressive but don’t add anything new because I didn’t really do much.”

📎 You can't polish a Google Doc that says ‘attended meetings’ 14 times.

☑ “Help me describe my 3-month job without making it sound like I got fired.”

🫢 “Left to pursue new opportunities” = told your boss their brainstorm was mid.

☑ “Write a thank-you email that makes them remember me forever.”

📬 You meant well. But quoting The Notebook was... a choice.

☑ “I need a networking message that doesn’t sound awkward but makes them help me immediately.”

🎯 Your goal is a coffee chat. Your tone is emotional ransom note.

☑ “Turn my gap year into something strategic and not just… tired.”

🛋 “Sabbatical focused on personal growth” = watched 11 seasons of Grey’s Anatomy.

☑ “I want a job that pays six figures and requires no meetings. Make it happen.”

💸 We all do, legend. We all do.

☑ “Help me ask for a reference without sounding like I ghosted them since 2021.”

📲 “Hey! Long time! Can you vouch for me even though we haven’t spoken since the Peloton boom?”

📝 Mini Reminder:

Good prompts are specific.

Great prompts are honest.

Terrible prompts get screenshotted and forwarded to us.

💬 CLOSER:

Your career is not a Mad Libs worksheet.

But if it feels like one? We’ll help you fill in the blanks.

(And then probably roast them with love.)

📣 Send us your AI-based prompt - real or progmess-style. We'd love to share with our readers (if you meet our standards, of course).

💡The Sports Page

🏓 Pickleball Emerges as Top Driver of Midlife Career Pivots

“I thought I was burned out — turns out I just needed a rally score.”

By The Work in Progmess Sports Desk (powered by electrolytes, lead tape, and absurd scoring rules)

In a shocking upset to traditional career development models, Pickleball has dethroned LinkedIn as the go-to solution for professionals in the throes of a midlife crisis.

Gone are the days of soul-searching in airport lounges or signing up for overpriced executive coaching led by someone named Bryce. Today’s overwhelmed professionals are finding clarity, connection, and questionable cardio on the pickleball court.

“I used to think I needed a mental health day,” said Diane, former VP of Something Important at a tech company she can’t quite remember. “Turns out, I just needed to win back-to-back rallies against a dentist from Scottsdale. I haven’t opened my inbox in 11 days.”

The Pivot, Rebranded

Career coaches now estimate that for every one person updating their résumé, three are updating their paddle grip. “It’s the new vision board,” says Dr. Helen Trott, a licensed occupational therapist-slash-doubles partner. “People don’t want clarity — they want a dink shot and a post-match smoothie.”

Workplace Slack channels are being replaced by DUPR ratings. Corporate retreats have ditched breakout sessions for bracket play. One startup CEO recently restructured his entire leadership team based on court performance: “If you can't handle the kitchen, you can't handle a product launch.”

Metrics That Matter

Recruiters are taking note.

In a recent poll:

• 72% of hiring managers said they’d at least glance at a résumé that mentioned “Pickleball Strategist.”
• 34% of execs admitted they’ve judged a colleague’s leadership potential based on their ability to call the score correctly.
• 100% of respondents refused to define what “DUPR” actually stands for.

The Dark Side of the Court

Of course, with great dink comes great delusion.

Some professionals are letting things get... a little out of hand. “I told my spouse I was networking,” admitted Greg, a recently laid-off marketing director now playing 11AM rec league matches in neon compression sleeves. “I’m up to four paddles and two pending partnerships with pickle-themed kombucha brands. I’m fine. It’s fine.”

📩Dear Progmess

“I Posted on LinkedIn and Now I Feel... Exposed”

Dear Progmess,

I finally worked up the nerve to post something on LinkedIn. Nothing wild—just a short reflection about a project I wrapped and what I learned.

Within five minutes, I had edited it twice, removed an emoji, re-added it, checked the likes four times, and texted two friends to ask, “Is this too much?”

Why does something as simple as hitting “post” make me question everything I’ve ever accomplished?

— Refreshing with Regret

Dear Refreshing,

Ah yes.

You’ve experienced what researchers at the University of Inbox Anxiety call:

“Post-and-Panic Syndrome.”

A recent* study showed that 92% of professionals feel immediate discomfort after posting on LinkedIn.

(*Study sample: our group chat.)

Symptoms include:

• Second-guessing your tone
• Counting likes in 5-minute intervals
• Debating whether the word “journey” was too vulnerable
• Whispering “what was I thinking?” while eating almonds

But here’s the truth:

You didn’t do anything wrong.

You just made the tragic mistake of being thoughtful in a space where most people post like they're trying to get scouted by the Algorithm Olympics.

🧠 Why It Feels Like a Risk:

• You’re trying to sound professional and like a person, which is a tightrope walk across a Teams channel.
• You hit “post,” and suddenly remember 73 people from your past who now know you had thoughts.
• That one recruiter who ghosted you in 2019? They saw it. And they judged it. Probably.

Oh, and that lovely internal whisper:

“Who do I think I am?”

We hear that one too. It has season tickets to our self-doubt imposter syndrome conference.

✅ What (Kind of) Helps:

1. Run the “Would I Say This to a Real Human?” Test

If you’d bring it up on a coffee chat or in a team retro, it probably belongs in the feed.

If it reads like ChatGPT and your inner motivational speaker had a baby—try again.

2. Post and Step Away From the Refresh Button

According to behavioral data from Progmess Labs™, watching for engagement does not summon it faster.

Distract yourself. Do laundry. File an expense report.

(Just kidding. No one does those.)

3. Remember the Like Lag Is Real

LinkedIn engagement follows no known pattern of time or logic.

Someone will like your post in 4 days, and it will absolutely be your ex’s new boss. That’s just science.

4. Keep Posting Anyway

The second post is less awkward. The third still feels odd.

The fourth one? You forget to obsess over it.

By the fifth, someone will message you and say,

“Thanks for posting that. I thought it was just me.”

Spoiler: it never was.

👀 Pro Tip from the Field:

The strongest leaders aren’t the ones with the flashiest posts.

They’re the ones willing to say something real and let it sit—unpolished, unboosted, unbothered.

So go ahead. Post what matters to you.

And then go do something that reminds you you're more than your notifications tab.

— Progmess

P.S. You are legally allowed to post something without a CTA. We checked.

P.P.S. The first like always comes from someone you forgot you ever worked with. It’s tradition.

📩Until Next Time…

That’s a wrap on Work In Progmess, where we believe:

• Your job isn’t your personality, but sometimes it’s the only interesting thing on your calendar.
• Posting on LinkedIn shouldn’t feel like revealing your middle school poetry, but here we are.
• And yes, pickleball is networking now. Adapt or be relegated to the snack table.

Remember: you’re allowed to ask for more, even if it’s just emotional bandwidth and a slightly less chaotic Google Doc. We’ll be back next week with more insights, more ridiculous prompts, and probably one more Greg story.

The most popular response we have gotten from this newsletter is... "my nephew needs to read this." So if you have a niece or nephew or child or partner or friend (or colleague who just whines all the time) who is a work in progmess, send them your magic link below and we will reward you with The CEO of You workbook.

Be the reason someone else has a mini career epiphany 👇 Your personal magic link: [RH_REFLINK GOES HERE] Facebook Twitter Whatsapp Linkedin PS: You have referred [RH_TOTREF GOES HERE] people so far ⚡️ by SparkLoop

Until then: take the win, take the nap, and take yourself a little less seriously.

Whistle whistle,​
—The Progmess Editorial Team

P.S. You scrolled this far? Impressive. Click here for 🧨 The Bitter End™ (It's either wisdom, chaos, or a dad joke. We don’t even know anymore.)

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