Issue #10 Sliding in early?! Yeah - it is time to get to work

​The Work in Progmess Team​ May 27, 2025

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💌 From the Editor’s Desk

This week’s Work In Progmess dives into what happens when you declare yourself CEO of your life but refuse to hold a single staff meeting.

We’re exploring whether Tim Ferriss and Angela Duckworth could win in a cage match (spoiler: it depends on your caffeine intake).

If your LinkedIn says “visionary” but your life says “low-power mode,” you’re in the right inbox.

Judgment? Yes. But also snacks. And a deeply disorganized pep talk.

—The Mess

📊Messy Metric of the Week

86% of people who say they’re the “CEO of their life” also have their status as stealth mode.​
(Sources: Our vibes. And Craig. Definitely Craig.)

True? Questionable. But this is:
​56% of Gen Z workers say they plan to become entrepreneurs yet only 12% have actually started a business. (Source: EY & JA Worldwide, 2023)

Get on it people.

📰Headline Shocker

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🗞️ Work In Progmess Exclusive

BREAKING: “CEO of My Own Life” Hasn’t Opened for Business Since 2022

In a shocking twist for the self-help industry, Work In Progmess has uncovered that the self-declared CEO of Me, Inc. has no posted business hours, no active mission, and no known deliverables—despite being “entrepreneurial-minded” on their LinkedIn profile.

“I’m the CEO of my own life,” said the subject confidently, moments before hitting snooze for the fourth time and muting a Slack notification from their future.

📉 Key findings include:

• Office Hours: Unknown. Possibly lunar.
• Customer Service: “Sorry, I’m really bad at texting back.”
• Productivity Strategy: Hoping it just happens.
• Quarterly Goals: "IDK, maybe start a Substack?"

Leadership experts warn this growing epidemic of title inflation with zero execution may be linked to a dangerous condition known as ✨“aspirational identity with no logistics.”✨

🚪Door sign currently reads:

The subject was last seen reorganizing their dry erase notes and updating their résumé to “Strategic Visionary.” The calendar remains blank.

🪪 This story is part of our “You, Inc.” investigative series.

Coming soon:

• “Who’s Your Target Market? (Do They Even Know You Exist?)”
• “Why Your Mission Statement Sounds Like a Dating Profile”

The series will continue when we feel like it. Or when you finally do.

💡The Sports Page

⛳ SPORTS PAGE | WORK IN PROGMESS WEEKLY

🥊 Book Duel: The Fight for Your Professional Soul

📘 In This Corner: The 4-Hour Workweek by Tim Ferriss

Alias: The Anti-Hustle Hacker

Core Belief: Work is a problem to be optimized out of existence.

Training Regimen: Outsourcing, batch emailing, semi-retirement at 29.

🗣️ “Escape the 9-to-5, live anywhere, and join the new rich.”

Ferriss wants you to stop answering emails, hire a virtual assistant in Bali, and run a supplement company from a hammock.

Special Moves:

• 🧠 “Muse” Creation Kick
• 💻 VA Roundhouse Reply
• ☕ Eliminate-Meetings Elbow Drop

📕 And in This Corner: Grit by Angela Duckworth

Alias: The Relentless Grinder

Core Belief: Success isn’t about talent—it’s about effort over time.

Training Regimen: Perseverance, passion, and powering through every obstacle.

🗣️ “Enthusiasm is common. Endurance is rare.”

Duckworth believes the path to greatness is paved with sweat, setbacks, and probably crying in your car during Q2.

Special Moves:

• 🏃 Persistence Piledriver
• 📈 10-Year Goal Uppercut
• 🧗 Obstacle Climb-and-Crush

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🎤 Round 1: Daily Life

• 4-Hour Workweek: Deletes Slack. Asks ChatGPT to write a post. Disappears to Tulum.
• Grit: Organizes her Notion dashboard by decade. Sends follow-up emails to follow-ups.

Winner: Depends. Do you want a hammock or a high-performance review?

🎤 Round 2: Advice on Failure

• Ferriss: “Failure? Great. Automate the recovery.”
• Duckworth: “Failure? Even better. Let it build character.”

Winner: Duckworth by moral KO. Ferriss by actual job satisfaction.

🎤 Round 3: Life Philosophy

• Ferriss: Outsmart the system.
• Duckworth: Outlast the storm.

Winner: The audience, honestly. Both philosophies are valid depending on your burnout level and whether you’ve had lunch today.

🏁 Final Verdict:

There’s no winner—only options.

If your inbox gives you chest pain and your job feels like performance art for middle management, you may want to channel Ferriss and exit stage left.

If you’re building something big, messy, and meaningful—Duckworth’s playbook will get you there with your integrity intact (and possibly a few extra therapy sessions).

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🤝 Dear Work in Progmess

💌 Dear Work In Progmess,

I keep hearing that I need a personal brand. But every time I try to “put myself out there,” I either sound like a business coach or a girlboss having a breakdown. Do I have to be a brand? Can I just be… a person?
– Sydney-ish

💬 Dear -Ish,

You are a person.
A person with a browser history full of half-finished portfolio sites, private mood boards, and one very cursed attempt at a LinkedIn banner. We get it.

You want to be intentional… but also authentic.
Visible… but not obnoxious.
Strategic… but not OCD.

To help you figure out how you’re currently showing up online (and maybe what’s getting lost in translation), we made this:

📋 Best Version of You? Let’s Check the Receipts

1. ✅ Your profile picture is not cropping out an ex.
2. ✅ Your bio doesn’t say “aspiring” anything.
3. ✅ Your banner image isn’t a mountain you climbed emotionally.
4. ✅ Your last three posts aren’t all “So humbled to announce…” with zero context and a photoshopped graphic.
5. ✅ You leave comments that sound like a human, not ChatGPT with a LinkedIn addiction.
6. ✅ You’ve replied to that DM from January instead of just marking it unread until the wifi goes out.
7. ✅ You checked what your profile looks like to the public and untagged that photo from your cousin’s bachelorette party.
8. ✅ You don’t use “🔥🔥🔥” to describe promotions unless you’re a firefighter or literally on fire.
9. ✅ You post more than once a fiscal year, but less than someone who thinks "love this" is a content strategy.
10. ✅ Your posts reflect your values, not just what gets the most engagement from crypto bros and your old boss.

📢 Classifieds Contributor Spotlight

This week’s dual submission comes from Craig Anderson, who answered our “Now Hiring: Contributor to the Chaos” call with not one, but two brilliant gems from the trenches of corporate delusion.

He is now unofficially titled:
🧠 Chief Strategic Overthinker and Meeting Fatigue Specialist, Work In Progmess Labs​
(Compensation still TBD. We’re thinking snack coupons and shared trauma.)

Seeking: Strategic Overthinker​
​Location: Inside your own head (remote, but emotionally unavailable)

Schedule: Flexible, in that you’ll work 60 hours trying to make a 20-hour project feel “good enough to share”

Compensation: Internal validation (maybe)

Job Description:
Seeking someone to triple-guess every decision, anticipate every objection, and rewrite the email six times before deleting it entirely. Must enjoy creating flawless systems no one asked for, and then quietly resenting when nobody follows them. Ability to spot logical flaws in motivational posters a plus.
Will report to whoever just said “Can you hop on a quick call?”
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​FOR SALE: My Willingness to Pretend This Meeting is Helpful​
Lightly used. Comes with default nodding, camera fatigue, and a browser tab with a fake dashboard I scroll through to seem engaged.
Make me an offer. I’m also wiling to trade my emotional resilience for decent lunch recommendations.

📩Until Next Time…

If you're still reading, congratulations—you just finished the newsletter equivalent of inbox zero.

Go hydrate. Send one thoughtful message to someone who deserves better than “circling back.”

And remember: You’re not behind. You’re just building something that doesn’t exist yet.
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Until next week,
—The Progmess Dept.

Be the reason someone else has a mini career epiphany 👇 Your personal magic link: [RH_REFLINK GOES HERE] Facebook Twitter Whatsapp Linkedin PS: You have referred [RH_TOTREF GOES HERE] people so far ⚡️ by SparkLoop

Snarkily yours,​
—The Progmess Editorial Team

P.S. Honestly, this newsletter would have been in your inbox an hour ago but we were too busy laughing at the Bitter End.

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